Camp Shelby

We arrived at Camp Shelby on the 12th of March. We pulled on to the base and proceeded to the barracks where our husbands had been living for the past 6 months. As we pulled up my heart started racing, I was so scared. Then I saw this figure walking towards me in uniform. Not knowing who's husband it was I squinted tightly to see if I could read the name tape on his shirt. GAZELKA! Yes! I ran as fast as I could straight at him and leapt into his arms.

They had been released about an hour prior to us arriving, so as soon as we got there they were ready to go. Alaina and Matt were riding with us since they couldn't get their car until the 14th. Our first order of business was to get something to eat and get a drink. It was around 2-3pm and we hadn't eaten since 7am so we were a bit hungry. We went to the Lonestar Steakhouse which was right next to our hotel. After a good dinner we parted and went to our respective hotel rooms. We did not see the light of day until the next morning.

The guys had formation in the morning. We got up extra early and took them to McDonalds for breakfast. Not exactly what Alaina and I were looking for but that is all they wanted...McDonalds. I guess there are a few things that you miss about the civilian world, and one of them always seems to be Mickey Ds. Formation was short so Alaina and I just waited around for them to be done.

When they got done we really didn't have too much to do and the boys were forced to wear their uniform everywhere they went until the 16th when pass started. So they weren't to gung-ho about doing much of anything in public. We went to Best Buy and screwed around there for a while. Then we decided to drive around and scope out where we would be staying the next couple nights, since this was the night that we didn't have anywhere to stay. We had planned on camping out at our friend's cabins that they had rented. But while we were scoping out the hotels we were driving by this DaysInn Hotel and I thought to myself...I know they are going to have a room here. It was a shot in the dark because we had called every hotel in town previously to try and find a room with no luck. I walked up to the clerk and asked her if they had a room for the night and she replied that they were booked. I was not convinced so I asked if she had a waiting list that we could be on in case a room came up. She sighed and asked what my name was and said that if I would come back in a couple hours that they would have a room for me. What?!? Mississippi is so weird.

So we decided to get some lunch at Buffalo Wild Wings just around the corner. We played trivia, ate wings and drank some beers. It was the first thing that we had done that seemed normal for Dathan and I. Drinking and eating! When we were done it was about time to check in to the room we had just aquired. They only had one available so we shared it with Matt and Alaina.

The next morning was an early one. I can't remember what time, all I know is we had to get up at 5am and drive them to the base. This was a longer day for them. They had to practice for the upcoming ceremony on the 16th, so Alaina and I dropped them off and went back to the hotel. We showered, ate breakfast and picked up Alaina's rental car. Then a couple other girls called and asked if they could come over and use our shower and then we would go shopping.

Alaina, Emily, Linda, Annie and I went shopping then went to pick up our guys around 1pm. That day we pretty much just sat around in our hotel room. Pretty boring, but quailty alone time was spent.

The Trip

We had a great visit with our men in Camp Shelby and various other places. Linda, Alaina, Emily and I headed out on Saturday, March 11th at around 9am. It usually seems like eons to get to the bottom of Minnesota, this time it was a breeze. We talked, played 20 questions, and listened to my new XM Radio. Linda brought along a little hand held 20 questions game that asked the questions and tried to guess your word. As usual, our minds were very dirty. One of the questions was, "Does it come in a box?" There after it was the joke of the trip..."Does it cum in a box?"

We got to Jackson, MS around 7am on Sunday morning. Most of us were pretty worn out, besides little Emily who slept most of the trip. We stopped for breakfast at a Waffle House to figure out what we were going to do for showers and Linda's rental car that we needed to pick up in Jackson. (Camp Shelby is about 2 hours from Jackson.) We finally decided on getting a hotel room for a couple hours to wind down, shower and fix ourselves up.

After the showers and morning weather information on TV we were on our way. We picked up Linda's car and headed out on our last leg to Camp Shelby. Alaina rode with me on the last stretch and Emily rode with Linda. It was kind of fun to have some one-on-one time with Alaina to get to know eachother better. There's nothing like 2 hours in the car to learn more about a person. We shared our stories of how we met our husbands and what marriage has been like for us since. Alaina and I get along very well, I am glad to have gotten to know her better over the past 6 months.

Off to Camp Shelby, MS

We leave in 4 days! Me and 2 other girls leave Saturday morning to see our husbands for the last time before they leave for Iraq. We will be driving my Expedition cross country 24 hours to Camp Shelby, MS.

Our emotions are running ramped. We have excitement, nervousness, stress, joy, anger, happiness, terror, rage, desire, etc. That is a lot of emotions to have all at once. Wouldn't you just love to be in my household right now. I am a ball of moodiness. One minute I am up and excited to leave and see my husband, the next I am angry and terrified of what is to come after I come back home. I try to look at the positive aspect of things and think about the next week I will be able to spend with my hubby. But there are plenty of us who can only think of the future and they cry all the time. I too think of the future....the distant future! When I will be able to have my DH back for good. He will be mine, all mine and the Army will have nothing to say about it.

The next 2 weeks are going to be....there are no words for my feelings. If I could put all the aforementioned emotions into one word, that would be how the next 2 weeks are going to be. I know that my husband is more than excited to see me. I think he is even a little nervous too, though he won't admit it.

I will be spending the next 4 days prepping to make the trip. I need to pack clothes for both of us, clean my truck, get a tune up, tan some more, work out every day, find someone to watch my dog, and square away all my affairs at work. The week will be stressful, but it will go so fast. In no time I will be lying in by Dh's arms, completely content.

The girls out on our de-stressing night. After bowling a couple more girls met up with us, so here we are.

Bowling

Saturday night we decided to have a de-stressing night of bowling and dinner with the girls. We invited around 15-20 people. It ended up being just me, Linda and Annie. We had a blast, it the perfect get away. The following are a couple snap shots of us and our "Freestyle Bowling"!

Here's Annie's big green ball!

Here's Linda's "Spin Bowl"

I call this the "Ballerina Bowl"

Communication

Sunday we had a baby shower for one of the wives, it was also the day we were all expecting to hear from our husbands after nearly 2 weeks of silence. The baby shower kicked off at 1pm, you could see each wife clinching to her cell phone waiting patiently for "the Call". None of us wanted to be the last, and wondered as the day went on after the first few calls were made..."is my husband going to call? OR What!" It was a long day but we all pulled together and ended up hanging out until 8pm. We ordered pizza around 5:30pm and sat around and shared our thoughts and concerns about the deployment.

As usual, the conversation turned to sex as we were watching a video documentary of Camp Shelby. It did not matter that we didn't neccessarily see our husbands, but just to see men in uniform was making us hot and miss our husbands. Then one of the wives was commenting on how she couldn't wait until March because this was the longest she had ever gone with out sex since she was 16. I had to think about it. Then another shouted at least you guys got to have sex during Christmas break!! I just had the baby.... "Oh no!", we all jeered. Then the pregnant one says, "Oh yeah, well at least you guys have something to look forward to!" (She will be delivering near the Pass time.) Suddenly I did not feel so bad about my current situation. We all sat around and joked a little while longer and shared our fears and excitement of seeing our husbands.

It's the weirdest feeling in the world, you want nothing more than to see your husband, but you are also so nervous of what he is going to think of you. For example, my husband has lost 35lbs since the deployment, and I fear that he has such high expectations of me that I won't add up. I know these are irrational fears, but at this stage in the deployment it seems that we are all irrational. So I don't feel so bad. The only thing I can do is to just buck up and get my butt to the gym. Afterall I only have less than 3 weeks until I see him!!! Yeah!

Time is going by so slowly. But I am so excited to be back in communication with my man again. He ended up being the 2nd to last to call on Sunday. His phone is not working again so he had to wait and borrow someone else's. He was tierd and cranky, to be expected after being up for 40hrs straight. They had not had a shower in 12 days, nor a hot meal or more than 4 hrs of sleep a night. I felt so sorry for him. But I am also so proud. The conversation didn't last too long, he had alot of work to do and needed to get some sleep. To my surprise he called back a half an hour later when I was in my car driving home. It kind of hit me at a bad time, because tears were already welling up in my eyes. When I heard his voice again I started sobbing. I tried to make it stop because I do not like to cry in front of him and especially not in this situation when there is nothing he can do to comfort me and it sort of makes him angry because he's frustrated. I tried to suck it up, I couldn't. I didn't even know what was wrong. Then I just let it all out. Everything that I had been wanting to talk to him about for the past 2 weeks just poured out. The last thing I wanted to do was to burden him with my problems a home. To my surprise, he handled it very well. He comforted me and assured me that everything would be just fine. I learned later that I was not the only one who cried that night. My DH told me that everyone he talked to said that their wife cried too. It's great to know that I am not alone. It's great to have friends who are all going through the same emotions. I don't know what I would do without having such a close support group to call and here the same concerns mirrored back to me.

Remodeling Update

We finally finished remodeling the basement yesterday. It's been almost 2 weeks. The first weekend we worked all day Friday and Saturday, and by 3pm on Sunday I was so tierd and my arms were so sore that I couldn't even lift them above waist level, so I quit. I was stressed out by the pressure to get it done and frustrated that I didn't exactly know what I was doing (plus being alone) so I just said "fuck it" and decided to give up and hire someone. I have to admit I did a pretty good job for not knowing what I was doing. But it was time to give up.

I decided to do the things I know I am good at so I cleaned house and made a big Sunday dinner. On Monday at the office one of the guys there, Randy asked me how things were going at home and if there was anything he could help with...boy did he open a can of worms. I told him all about the escapades we had been through in the past few days and his reply was "Mandy! Why didn't you call me? That's what I used to do for a living." Well hell! If I would have known that I would have asked sooner. So he agreed to come over and help me finish what I had started. He finished the mudding and had the texturing done by last Sunday. I looks great.

I rented a texture spraying machine with an air compressor for him. And he had it finished on Sunday night before I got back home. He called and said that he had left the texturer downstairs and to call him in the morning to load it up. I informed him that Katie was supposed to be coming over that night and that we could handle it. Well...Monday morning came and Katie had not come over and I had to return the machine to the store. Instead of bothering Randy I decided that I was Super Woman and that I could probably handle carrying a 100lb machine up the stairs and into the truck. Well I handled it alright! I got it into the truck and returned it to the store all by myself. I was actually pretty proud. The problem was that about an hour later I was in extreme pain. I had thrown out my back. Now there's some pain. I decided to self medicate with heat wraps and Alieve, even though everyone sugessted that I go to a chiropractor.

By Thursday morning I was still in pain. So I called and made the appointment. I went in and the doctor fixed me right up. It still hurts a little but it's only been 2 days, he said I should feel fine by tomorrow. On Thursday night we finally got around to painting, since I couldn't do it any sooner because of my back. So now the project is done and Katie is moving in today. What a relief to finally finish. I don't think I am going to do anymore projects for a couple months. I figure that by the time I get back from visiting my husband in Mississippi in March I should be ready again. I still have one room upstairs that needs attention. But for now I am just going relax and take it easy.... Yeah right!

Remodeling and Roomates

I decided to get a roomate. My friend Katie wanted to move in with me and I was getting pretty lonely, so I agreed. I have an extra bedroom with a bathroom in my basement that is partially remodeled. When we bought the house 4 years ago our intentions were to fix it up right away. Well...4 years later it is still the same.

The people we bought the house from thought that they were construction workers and decided to put up drywall and tape it themselves. Stupid. There is an inch thick of mud on the ceiling with no tape, there are gaps in the sheetrock, and large rectanglar holes for circular fixtures. It is a mess. But being the fix it woman that I am I thought, heck I can do this. So I got out my "Home Improvement 1-2-3" book from Home Depot and read up on drywalling. Then proceeded to Home Depot to gather my supplies. I obtained a sanding pole, some hand sanders, mud, tape and corner bead. The guy at Home Depot who was helping me thought I was nuts.

I started last night by sanding off all the excess mud created my the home's previous owners. It was going pretty well so far. Then Katie came over and brought pizza. Then I educated her on what we were doing and what the stuff in the bucket was called and why we put it on the walls. She had never done anything like this before, but she caught on really fast. We finished sanding and decided to begin taping the walls. 1st step...Open the bucket. That doesn't seem hard. Well maybe not to a man with strong fingers and short fingernails. But to 2 small women with long manicured nails....well you get the point. I was snapping of the last part of the cover when "SNAP!", there goes my fingernail. And I'm not talking the little white tip, I'm talkin' the whole nail! Ouch! All I could do was laugh. The situation seemed so humerous. Two women without a clue doing drywall and I broke a nail. Wow.

The taping proceeded pretty smoothly. I did call my husband for advice. I directed my questions to our good friend Zach who is in the unit with my husband. He does construction for a living. I think he was pretty suprised to hear I was tackling the dreaded basement bedroom, which we lovingly call Zach's room, because that's were he sleeps when he stays over. He calmly tried to explain ceiling technique to me, but I'm sure he was thinking that I was going to royally fuck it up. I sure wish they were here. It would be so much easier to just have them do these projects. But then again, it probably wouldn't get done for God knows how many more years.

More updates on the project to come soon. Right now I am killing time waiting for the battery charger on my truck to do it's job, since neither one of my cars will start today. Got to love Minnesota!

This is me and my girls, Stephanie and Katie. I love them to death and will protect them with all my heart.

This is Stephanie's new friend. Which I do not necessarily approve of. He is high maintainence and ditzy. His name is Dustin. Although they are so much alike. I think they are perfect for eachother but I would never choose him. He is from the cities and thinks he is always right. Only time will tell.

All my single friends are finally finding boyfriends! I am so happy for them, but it's also so scary. I am very protecive of them and I want them to be happy. This is Katie and her new friend Derek. He is very nice and I totally approve of him so far. He seems like he likes her alot and that he's mature. He also is going somewhere in life, he graduates this spring.

We had a great weekend. All the wives went out on the town on Saturday and had a blast. Everyone got home safe and we didn't start any fights. It's amazing how different we act when it's just us girls. We are so much more defensive and I am very combative. If any guy even so much as talked to one of the girls I was like, "Who are you, and what do you want?" It was hilarious. Actually, no one really bothered us because we stayed in a large group of women the entire time, which I'm sure is intimidating to men.

Sunday I had an open house. When I went to pick up my signs that were leaning against my garage I was very surprised. They were frozen solid in about 8 inches of ice and snow. So I grabbed my shovel and tried to shovel them out. But, much to my demise that did not work. So I got my blow torch and tried to melt the ice...that worked a little but they were still frozen. The final method was a flat bar and a hammer. Uh-oh! Me and tools! I chipped away at the ice and finally got the signs out after more than 1/2 an hour. What a work out. The open house was extremely boring, I only had one couple stop by.

Then I went to my parents and watched a movie and ate dinner. I finished kitting my first scarf during the movie. Knitting has become my new hobby to pass the time.

The Guard wives night out on the town!

Where is your husband?

Here is a drunken blog, I wrote it when I got home and saved it as a draft and I am now publishing it for your pleasure! I was at the American Legion. I was dancing with one of my dad's old friends, Vern. He asked me to dance and he's blind, so I felt sorry for him. But this is the conversation that ensued during the dance......

Tonight I was asked where my husband was. My response was that he was being deployed to Iraq. They asked...What will he be doing over there? My 5 drink response was...Killing Rag Heads! They said...Oh. That's good, at least when he gets back he will be a veteran and get all the benefits. Please. That is total bullshit. You get better benefits from retiring as a fucking janitor. My husband will lay his life on the line everyday for the freedom of the American people and the least you can say is... at least he will have benefits! Bull fucking shit. He (They) deserve better than that. The average citizen is so ignorant. Which is why my husband and his comrades must go and fight to keep this country safe from terrorists. Because God knows what would happen if people like the ones I met tonight were able to run this country.

Alone Again

The vacation was wonderful. It was so weird at first, when I saw him, I didn't even recognize him. The fact that he lost nearly 25lbs probably played a huge role, but for the first few hours it was like we had to get re-aquainted, it was so weird. I drove until we got out of the cities then when we stopped at Mc D's to get some food I let him drive the rest of the way. It was hilarious when he started driving he stepped on the gas so hard, then slammed on the brake, I thought we were going to die. He was used to driving the Bradley's instead of a car. It took him awhile to get used to it, so I just gritted my teeth and prayed. We made it home ok.

Vacation was filled with plenty of partying and drinking. We also visited family during Christmas. It was a blast. I was sad to see it end. The day before he left again was really hard. The thought of the departure made us both extremely irritable. We stayed the night in a hotel near the airport that night because his flight left early the next day. The whole night we were at eachother's throats. It wasn't because we didn't love eachother. We were both just sad and pissed that he had to leave again. Plus the thought of going back to Camp Shelby, MS is not a welcoming thought. Camp Shelby is the armpit of America. It compares to a 3rd world country...And I get to visit it in March! Yeah, I am so excited! That was the only day we even said a cross word to eachother. Which was not the case with some of the other wives and thier soldiers. I love my husband...that's all I can say.

Tomorrow is the day!

I think I have accomplished everything I can do, considering my husband comes home tomorrow. My furniture for my bedroom came today. It was a "huge" surprise when they started to bring it into the house, and I do mean "huge" in multiple senses. When you look at a piece of furniture on a showroom floor and compare it to a 12'x14' room, things tend to get a wee bit skewed. So you can imagine my surprise when the furniture I picked out looked gigantic compared to when I bought it. But everything turned out just fine. It all fits and looks great. I hope he loves it as much as I do.

I did not do the plumbing, although I tried. When I put the new faucet in water still came out when it was turned off. I tried every possible way, nothing seemed to work. So I just put it back the way it was before and kept the water to the sink turned off. No biggy, he can fix it while he's home....I hope.

Big day tomorrow, and I am so nervous. It feels like a first date. I haven't seen him in nearly 3 months. I picked out a new outfit and I am going to have my hair and make-up done just right when I see him. I hope he's happy. Which I can't think of any reason why he wouldn't be. He hasn't seen a women in 3 months! Or at least any worth mentioning. I hope I live up to his expectations. Only time will tell. We're just hours away... Yeah!!!

It's Fricken Cold Outside

I woke up early this morning to go into work and get some things done right away so I can go Christmas shopping this afternoon. And what happens when I try to leave...my truck won't start. It's like 5 degrees below zero and I didn't go anywhere yesterday so it's all froze up. I scrambled to try and think what my husband would do, because what I would usually do is yell, "Husband, my car won't start!", and go back inside where it is warm. But not this time. This time I went into the garage and pulled out the car charger, popped the hood and hooked that baby up, then ran back inside.

This living without your husband crap is for the birds. But I think I'm doing good so far. Only 2 days and a wake up till he is home for Christmas break. I better get going on putting in that new faucet before he gets here.

So far the house is put back together after my little remodeling project. And I even have the Christmas tree up! Now I just need to kick this cold I got yesterday in 2 days and everything will be just fine.

This is me!

Old Faithful

Well I figured out what has been wrong with me lately. I have been so depressed, and crabby in the past few weeks. I would cry everyday and snap at people all the time. And that's just not me. I thought it was because of the deployment and being all alone. I kept saying, "This is a lot harder than I thought it was going to be", I thought I was tough. Well I am, it wasn't me, it was the drugs! I had been taking Xenadrine to shed a couple extra pounds. It's a dietary supplement with NRG which is basically glorified caffine. I quit taking it because of a suggestion by one of my friends who thought the reason I was being so "bitchy" was because of the pills. So yesterday I tried going without. Wow! What a difference. I am back to my old happy, productive self. I am so happy. And no I didn't substitute it with speed!

So on the morning I quit taking the pills I decided to do some chores around the house and be productive. I had bought new washers and springs for my bathroom faucet. It has been dripping ever since we bought the house 3 years ago! So I thought, I'll show my husband, these things aren't tough, he could have done them years ago. So fresh out of the shower I decided to tackle it. I got my screwdriver and began to disassemble the handles. After I got them off I was prying on the stem with my screwdriver and.....Kaboom!!!! For future reference you must always turn off the water before attempting this task! Yeah...I forgot. Duh, what a no brainer. So there I am with the water shooting out of the top of the faucet like Old Faithful. I'm not talking the normal flow from a bathroom faucet, I'm talking the strength of the whole 4" well! The water was shooting up and hitting the bottom of the medicine cabinet and spraying all over the bathroom. So like an idiot I do the only logical thing and try to put my hand over it....no this is not the solution. Now the water was no longer shooting up, it was shooting out and all over me. Then the light bulb came on. Shut the fricken water off! Thank God there was a shut off under the sink. There was water everywhere. It had pooled inside the medicine cabinet, inside my make-up containers, all over the walls and floor. It even started to peel away my wallpaper border and make a pocket between the wall for water to sit in. I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to mop up all the water before it ruined anything. Whew. That was rough.

Now I was ready to finally fix the sink. So I took out the existing washers and replaced them with the new ones I bought, reassembled the sink, then tried the water. To my demise the water was no longer leeking...it was coming out at full force. "What the fuck!" I was so pissed. So I looked at the way I put it together and everything was fine. As I was bent over looking under the sink I see two words that I will never forget... "Washerless Faucet"! You got to be fricken kidding me. Who does this. The reason that the faucet was leeking in the first place was because who ever lived here before us put washers in it in the first place. I felt like an idiot. So I gave up on that project. I will probably have to replace the faucet. But I know I will remember to turn the water off FIRST!

One of those days

Today I woke up at 5am to total darkness (you got to love winter in Minnesota, dark when you wake up and dark when you get home) and I got ready to drive 2 1/2 hrs to Fargo, ND. Two things were to be accomplished today, take and pass my real estate broker's test and find bedroom furniture. I did both but not without headaches. I got to the testing site and was forced to wait 45 mins to get started on a supposedly 4 hr test. Once I got started I realized that the National portion of the test was much harder than I anticipated. I took me 45 minutes. The State portion took me 15minutes, it was much easier. Thank God I passed or I would have had to commit myself to a mental institution after waiting 1 1/2 months to take this test and drive 2 1/2 hrs. My friend Tia rode down with me for support and to go shopping.

After the test we went to the mall and did some clothes and Christmas shopping. Then we went to eat. By then I needed a drink.... so I had one. After a long lunch we went furniture shopping. When I finally found the set that I wanted I was informed that it couldn't be shipped to my house until the day before my husband was to return for Christmas. This freaks me out. I want everything to be perfect and now I'm crunched for time. If it even works out. Yikes!

Well I ordered it anyway, and we set off back home. On our way out of Fargo, which is flat and windy in the middle of winter, we hit black ice going 65mph. That would have been fine since I had my Expedition in AWD and it has new tires, but a gust of wind going approximately 40mph hit my high profile vehicle and sent us spinning across the highway at 65mph. There was no stopping it, the road was all ice and the wind was howling. We skidded back and forth, back and forth and around and around, over and over from one side of the highway to the next.....until finally coming to a stop. We were sitting on the side of the road about 1/2 mile from where we had started the spin. Tia was yelling the whole time, "You're ok, you're ok, you're doing fine, you're doing fine, it'll be ok!!!" Until we finally stop and she exclaimed "Whooly Shit!" over and over. (You get the point) I couldn't breathe and was shaking uncontrollably. We sat there wondering how we made it through that all the while staying out of the ditch. We both silently prayed and thanked God we were alive.

Fifteen minutes later we began to move again...very slowly. All the while calling all the other people on the road idiots for driving over 60mph. We saw 2 cars in the ditch shortly after that and again pondered what would have happened if that were us. We got home safe and sound. I am now faced with more chores and life tasks including all the messages I have on my work phone. Life is so stressful. But like I told my husband a few days ago when he told me that life is just hard sometimes. I told him that I read a joke in the paper the other day saying..."When life gives you lemons...Choke on 'em and die you stupid lemon eater!" And that's what I think about today.

Moving Day

Today was moving day for one of the wives, Toni, who is 6 months pregnant. So I got up early and picked up one of the other wives, Linda and we headed out to help move. Linda over slept so we got a little bit of a late start but it was no biggy. The first stop was Grand Rapids, where Toni had most recently been living. She had some stuff boxed up there for us to pick up and bring the rest of the way. It was a lot more than we had anticipated. It was a good thing we brought the Expedition instead of the car! So Linda and I started packing boxes into the truck. This is so weird. Because it's usually a thing a guy would do...the heavy lifting. But we are both tough girls so we managed. We also had a few laughs along the way, trying to fit all that stuff in there. It was packed front to back and floor to ceiling with "stuff". I was worried that we wouldn't fit back in there. Good thing I'm short.

Then 45 minutes later we arrived at Toni's new house. Which was bussling with her relatives. We unloaded the truck and that was pretty much all the moving that was left to do. Everyone else was unpacking, so we decided to chip in also. We unpacked boxes, put away clothes and so forth. I'm glad we could help her this is always a hard thing to do by yourself.

We left about 2:30 and I just arrived at home to a giant snow drift in my driveway. I hate living alone. On a normal day my husband would go out and get the 4-wheeler and plow it out. But now I must fend for myself. I am rather self sufficient but I don't like to be. I'd rather stay inside where it's warm. But we must all do what is necessary.

11 days and a wake up

To catch up to speed. The guys are coming home for Christmas break in 11 days and a wake up. We can't hardly wait. "We" being the wives. That's all anyone can talk about. We all just try to take it one day at a time. Trying not to think about when they have to leave again or how long they are going to be gone for next time. We are just glad to have the opportunity to see them.

Right now I am trying to prepare for the homecoming. There are so many things on my to do list, it's making me crazy. There is a cleaning list, including laundry, organizing, and general Spic and Span. Then there is the personal list: loose those extra pounds I put on before he left, go tanning, go Christmas shopping, etc. This may not sound stressful but when you create as much work for yourself as I have, it is. Plus add work on top of that. Thank God it's slow right now. Hell, I'm more nervous now than I was on my wedding day.

Now I have to go paint the ceiling in my bedroom because the carpet is being put in on Monday. And there's no time tomorrow because I have to drive 2 hours to help one of the other wives move. She's 6 months pregnant and has a 20 lb weight restriction. So we are all chipping in to carry boxes and stuff.

One of our old friends Keith just called and invited me to Becida Bar to sing karaoke. This is very hard for me to pass up but I am so tierd and oh yeah the painting. Bah humbug. Plus it's just not the same to go out without my husband. He's my best friend. I am starting to hang out with my girlfriends more but it just isn't the same. They don't know me like he does. Plus I need a driving buddy because Becida is a 1/2 hour away. Oh well, looks like it's me and the dog (Sam) watching the Food Network again.

I have become so addicted to that show. Too bad I have no one to try my new recipes on. Although everyone at work has been eating well. I have been bringing in baked sweet breads and soups for lunch. I love cooking, but not as much as I love watching men enjoy eating it. Here's the main reason it's not as fun anymore.

You can tell Christmas is right around the corner and the guys have no ideas what to get their wives. This is not their fault. They haven't been around for us to drop the obvious hints like in years past. They are trying to internet shop. It's so cute. Clothes....women are so hard to buy clothes for because we are all different shapes and sizes. You can have 2- 5'3" women who weigh 130lbs and they will not wear the same size nor will they be able to fit into the same pants, bras, lingerie, or even shirts. Poor guys, they try so hard. To tell them the truth, it really is the thought that counts. We can always exchange it after they leave.

They think they are hard to shop for! What do you buy a guy who doesn't need anything. And anything cool he wants he can't bring back with him. Aaaah! It's not even worth asking because they don't even know what they want. They'd be happy with a bottle of liquor and you naked with a bow on. Hell you could even skip the bow. Who knows.

From a wife's prospective

My husband has been deployed for 2 months and 10 days now. Life on the homefront is one that is usually not talked about much. No one really knows what it is like for a wife of a deployed soldier at home. I intend to change that. Each story is unique but this one is mine.

It all started with me getting prepared, like the coming of a baby, I ran around frantic trying to think of all the things that needed to be done before "it" happened. My husband was to leave me for a period of 18 months not to exceed 608 days. Which if you do the math is more like 20 months. That's the Army for you. But I guess that's what they tell us to keep us sane. It's also just like the Army to send already trained soldiers to a base within the United States to train for 6 months before actually even setting foot on foreign soil. These are not wet behind the ears kids. These are trained soldiers who a large quantity of them have already been deployed. These are guys who have families, jobs, careers, and lives at home. They have been through basic training, and some of them have been training for years. Who is the Army to say that it takes 6 months to train them? When they are sending 18 year old kids fresh out of basic training over there right away! I say kids in a loving way. I know that the minute they put on their boots they are no longer kids, they are men...trained killers. I just try to have the mind set that my husband and his comrades have. Try not to think....it's the Army.

Thinking... that's one of the hardest things not to do. There really isn't anything else to do. And I'm sure they agree. There is nothing to fill your time up with when you are not working (or training). You think about the future...the distant future. When they will be home for good, or at least until they decide to call them up again. Then you think about how you are going to get through the next day or how in the world you are going to get that heavy dresser all the way down the stairs by yourself. This is where friends come in. Those people that just before Dathan left who said, "If you ever need anything, anything at all, don't hesitate to call". Well to tell you the truth there are only a select few who will actually be there for you when the time comes. And those are the people Dathan calls his real friends.

Real Friends...that's one thing he said he wanted to know. He wanted to know those people who were his quote "real friends". The one's who would be there for me. The one's who wouldn't hit on me or try to take advantage of me. The one's who would stick up for me. All in all respect me and him. Anyone who wouldn't do something if Dathan were standing next to me shouldn't do it if he is gone. That's how I feel. I get extremely offended and pissed off if anyone makes any derogatory comments towards me just because my husband isn't there to defend me. Woah did they make a mistake. The words that have been coming out of my mouth lately....Wow.

I am a very proud army wife and there is no one who will ever change that or the way I feel about my husband even if he is a million miles away (or so it seems). Such is the life of a guard wife. To love and to cherish to have and to hold. See additional clause: Even if taken away by the Army for extended peroids of time not to exceed 608 days.